[Video]The story of Nigerian born adult actress, Afrocandy and the two wolves

10 02 2023





A Mother and a pornstar? The Story of Judith a.k.a Afrocandy

7 01 2023

by Chinwuba Iyizoba

According to an old Cherokee legend, a grandfather told his grandson, “My son, there are two wolves fighting inside us all. One is the devil. It is a combination of rage, jealousy, greed, resentment, inferiority, lies, and ego. The other is good; it is joy, peace, love, hope, humility, kindness, empathy, and truth.” After some thought, the boy asked, “Grandfather, which wolf wins?” The old man replied quietly, “the one you feed.” The story shows that depending on which wolf you feed, you can go from being a good person to a bad person; thus, in order to do good and avoid evil, you must feed the right wolf.

This appears t to be the story of Afrocandy, a Nigerian-born porn actress, who recently revealed that she was once a good homely wife. She shared photos of herself from 2001, dressed in traditional Igbo Christian mother attire complete with scarf and wrapper, and revealed that she was a regular churchgoer and parishioner at St. Leos Catholic Church.

Judith Mazagwu

So, what exactly happened? How did a Christian mother become a pornstar? How did a well-groomed Nigerian woman become a notorious Afrocandy seductress now poring over the internet in her underwear? Her real name is Judith Chichi Opara Mazagwu, she is an Imo state native, a wife, and a mother of two children, and she has a bachelor’s degree in public administration and a bachelor’s degree in business management.

In 2005, she traveled to the United States to meet her husband, with whom she had two children. Unfortunately, the marriage ended in an explosion of infidelity accusations, leaving her stranded in the United States with two children at the age of 36. Desperate Judith first tried acting and modeling, but lacking the skill or talent to make big money, she devolved into racy porn under the alias Afrocandy, something so out of character and shocking to ordinary Nigerians.

Today, her Afrocandy production company is the arrowhead pushing Nigerian pornography into mainstream Nollywood, and while she is currently meeting some resistance in the industry because most actors and actresses still have enough self-respect for themselves and their families to avoid crossing the thin red line between the innocuous nudity already present in Hollywood and outright pornography, she must sense that it is only a matter of time before they cave, and she is optimistic.

Hence, some argue that what caused the unassuming Judith to take such a drastic turn was the pain and betrayal of her broken marriage. According to an online magazine, in an interview with the Daily Sun published on September 3, 2010, she said she tried to save her marriage but he wouldn’t take her back:

“There have been a lot of rumors going around about my marriage and only a few people know the truth. The truth is that I did not leave my husband; rather, he left because of some gossip he heard about something that happened in Nigeria before I joined him in the US.

I begged him, and he returned. When he left the second time, I felt compelled to issue him with a restraining order. I really don’t want to go into details because I see that as the past, and I want the past to stay in the past because I’ve moved on; talking about it takes me backward.”

Furthermore, her rumored marriage to an Ibadan millionaire, Chief Kamoru Okiki, did not appear to have materialized in 2011, adding fuel to her downward spiral into the porn abyss. No doubt, all of her setbacks and doubles should be considered when judging this woman; however, with her level of education, she bears significant blame responsibility for allowing herself to be thus manipulated and induced by an excessive ambition and love for glamour. She appears to be someone who is willing to do anything for fame and fortune, including abandoning all decorum and modesty.

As previously stated, everyone has two wolves fighting within them: the wolf of wantonness that we all carry within us, which we must refuse to feed or it will lead us to dark places. Judith aka Afrocandy appears to have fed the wrong wolf her entire life, and it has grown into a werewolf devouring that part of her that was once a good homely Nigerian Christian woman full of decorum and good sense. Nonetheless, she should be aware that this wolf will devour her and everything associated with her. Furthermore, given that she was once a Christian and a Catholic, she should remember that pornography has been linked to harm to children and young people. The widespread availability of pornographic media has been linked to unwanted pregnancies in young people, as well as the spread of STDs such as HIV/AIDS among single adolescents (Ojo and Fasuuba, 2005). According to Nwankwo, about a third of adolescent pregnancies are terminated due to complications such as bleeding, anemia, and exhaustion (1983). And, as a mother, I am sure she understands the grave responsibility that those who create or market pornographic materials bear.

It is a pity that she has allowed herself to be used as an agent and purveyor of a foreign malicious culture alien to Nigerians in order to pollute and corrupt the minds of young people in a country already plagued by poverty, a lack of clean water, a hospital, and food scarcity. It’s a shame that all she has to offer our youth is a bad example. Longe et al. (2007) argue that. In a country where poverty is on the rise, children who sell their wares to help their families make ends meet are constantly exposed to situations that can jeopardize healthy sexual behaviors.

Unfortunately, the Internet, more than any other agent of social change, has contributed in no small measure to the removal of guilt, fear, and shame associated with unconventional sexual activities, and thus these poor Nigerian children have already been swamped and robbed of their peace of mind and African decency by the foreign crude bestial images emerging from dark taverns or Eastern Europe and sordid porn from America one click away on the internet, which they aspire to. Afrocandy has now deprived them of their last line of defense with her Nigerian porn. However, she should remember that those who throw stones should not live in a glass house. If she succeeds in corrupting our youths for profit, she may not like what she sees when the results come in, and the Holy Book says that it is better to tie a stone around their neck and throw them into the sea than to lead children to sin.

In conclusion, the breakdown of her marriage and being abandoned to fend for herself transformed a once homely Nigerian woman into a porn star, proving that everyone has both good and bad passions and must struggle despite the odds to feed the good side of ourselves. Nothing justifies turning to the dark path of pornography, so she must turn and feed the good things in her life, transforming herself into a force for good.


Works Cited

Longe, Olumide & Chiemeke, Stella & Onifade, Olufade & Scientifique, Laboratorie & Balogun, France & Longe, Folake & Otti, Victor Uzoma. (2007). Exposure of Children and Teenagers to Internet Pornography in South Western Nigeria: Concerns, Trends & Implications. JITI Journal of Information Technology Impact. 7. 195-212. Retrieved from http://www.researchgate.net/publication/228636199_Exposure_of_Children_and_Teenagers_to_Internet_Pornography_in_South_Western_Nigeria_Concerns_Trends_Implications/citation/download. Accessed January 2023

Nwankwo, J. Teenagers Need Protection from Unwanted Pregnancies. The  Guardian,  (1983, October 6), p.5

Ojo, O., & Fasubaa, O. . Adolescent Sexualityand Family Life Education in Southwestern Nigeria: Responses From Focus Group Discussion. Journal of Social Science,(2005) 10(2), 111-118.





The Endgame of the Sexualization of society

26 04 2022

The sexual revolution that began in the 1960s (3) appears to be reaching an endgame. A Twitter account called @LibsofTickTock recently re-posted videos of American kindergarten teachers talking about grooming kindergarten pupils, indoctrinating them with such concepts as a multiplicity of gender pronouns, and of non-binary genders, etc. According to Tucker Culson, these teachers posted personal videos with content such as:

TEACHER: Hi, my name is — and I’m a preschool teacher. Recently, we started wearing pronoun pins and the kids get to pick a new pronoun pin every day. We have something that picks she/her every single day and we have some that change it up.  

TEACHER:  So, I’m a non-binary preschool teacher and my kids know I’m non-binary. They know I’m not a girl or a boy. I use they/them pronouns in the classroom. We work on it. Not all kids get it. That’s OK and I go by Mx Gray in the classroom, not Miss or Mister.  

These concepts are largely still incomprehensible to many adults, and hence foisting them on minors should rightly be considered an attack on children’s minds.  This is not surprising because it follows years of attacks on adult minds by similar ideologies, disguised as pornography which began with the sexual revolution in the 1960s.

At the time, the mainstreaming of pornography warped the traditional meaning of sex as a noble means of unity and procreation between a married man and woman, distorting and perverting it as a means of self-gratification and recreation. This distortion opened the floodgate to every sexual perversion imaginable, same-sex union, and bestiality are but a few examples. As the reasoning goes, if sex is for pleasure and recreation, why limit it to heterosexuals? Why not homosexual or lesbian sex? Why not have sex with animals?

Hence, in the years preceding the sexual revolution, recreational sex is driven by mass consumption of pornography resulting in an epidemic of teenage pregnancy and abortions, and marital infidelity as the Catholic Church predicted. Furthermore, it gave rise to increased objectification of women and precipitated the erosion of marriage as a desirable institution in many countries. (3) As a whole, it has resulted in disrespect loss of dignity and value of human life. (4)

Furthermore, pornography consumption increased tolerance and was a driver for crimes such as sex trafficking, rape, incest, bestiality, and, of course, pedophilia. (1)   Recent research reveals that major online porn sites feature videos of people who have been kidnapped and raped. The reason beings the addictive nature of pornography produces an escalating and desensitizing effect. Hence porn watcher needs increasingly more hardcore and deviant porn to get the same high as before.

Jeffry Satinover, a psychologist from the United States, believes that excessive porn consumption leads to the trivialization of sexual crimes, whether against women or children. (2) Child abuse expert, Michael Sheath, expressed concern about the fact that online pornography has become a “gateway to child abuse.” Porn producers were getting more and more people interested in child pornography. Most popular porn sites now have more images and videos of child sex.

Hence, pornography was consumed in large numbers by people privately in the 1960s but was shunned in public spaces. Today, however, porn has taken over public spaces and all forms of entertainment and, as a result, has taken over the grooming of society everywhere and in every medium albeit television, social media, cable games, and even the Disney Cartoon Network(6.

In fact, the grooming of society is now so complete that you cannot pick up a newspaper or magazine without coming across some pornographic images; even in a magazine for electrical engineering, which has pictures of a naked woman on the front cover instead of transistors and integrated circuits, there are pictures of naked women.

After successfully grooming adults for pornography, they are now after children.  They are confident that their strategy will work as it worked in the past because society consists of a silent majority of decent people who do not want any trouble and are content to live a quiet life and hence cannot stop evil, even if they saw it. Their strategy worked because even though there are laws prohibiting obscenities,  society doesn’t enforce them. For instance, the US Department of Justice has not enforced the Federal Obscenity Laws Regulating the Production and Distribution of Pornography laws as well as the Federal Obscenity laws regarding minors, which have been in existence since 1873 and in 2011, the Obama administration scrapped it all together; hence, the escalation of porn production. (1)

The groomers are very persistent and never give up. They call their goal “social progress” to make it seem like it’s a good thing, they claim that early grooming is vital to prevent the children from becoming homophobic adults. They know that most people in society will not fight back. They started by making pornography more mainstream. Then they made homosexuality, transgender, and LGBTI more mainstream, and now they’re going to make pedophilia more mainstream, with their main goal being kids in kindergarten.

Sheath says that pornography has caused a cultural shift. Before the year 2000, men who looked at child porn had mental illnesses and violent pasts and were often victims of abuse. After the year 2000, normal men who didn’t have a violent past or had a difficult childhood were now fans of online child porn. This means that these “porn-made pedophiles,” as Sheath calls them, grew up watching more and more depraved porn until they became pedophiles, which corroborates tons of research data confirming that porn changes the mind. (2)

Furthermore,  Sheath argues that there is an undeniable link between easy access to deviant pornography and an interest in child molestation; the unambiguous link between strangulation- porn and sexual violence against women; and there are strong correlations between the erosion of protective taboos around incest and the prevalence of incestuous porn. (2)

In conclusion, these porn-made pedophiles are now coming after children in kindergarten. This is the end-game of porn-grooming that began in the 60s with the sexual revolution; they have infiltrated the very source, a game that would end with the warping of millions of young minds.

——–

References

  1. Grossu, A.O and Maguire.S .(2017). The Link between Pornography, sex trafficking and abortion. Retrieved from https://downloads.frc.org/EF/EF17K24.pdf
  2. Grant,H.(2020).How extreme porn has become a gateway drug into child abuse. Retrieved from https://www.theguardian.com/global-development/2020/dec/15/how-extreme-porn-has-become-a-gateway-drug-into-child-abuse
  3. Broussard, K. (2021). How Sex Becomes Dehumanizing. Retrieved from https://www.catholic.com/magazine/print-edition/how-sex-becomes-dehumanizing
  4. Bernhardt,B., and Sherk,J. (2021). Defending American Freedom. America First Policy institute. Retrieved from https://americafirstpolicy.com/assets/uploads/files/center-for-american-freedom-overview.pdf
  5. Kennedy, D. (2021, May 8). Disney goes woke with new anti-racist agenda for employees. The New York Post. https://nypost.com/2021/05/08/disney-goes-woke-with-new-antiracist-agenda-for-employees/




“Cuties” is generating a lot of fury

3 10 2020

Netflix movie “Cuties” is generating a lot of fury and rightly so.  Every sane person would agree that there is something disturbing about watching a movie where minors are dancing seductively and sexually suggestively. It makes one feel uncomfortable. Even the name “Cutie” is resoundingly deceptive and is a reflection of the dishonestly misappropriated language that has a clear meaning and attributing to something else. The word “Cute” according to the dictionary is defined as something attractive or pleasing in a youthful, dainty, quaint or fun-spirited way.  This is not what sexually suggestive twerks by 10 yr old girls is, and people who think otherwise may rightly be suspected of harboring deviant desire. The rest of the normal people these dances less than cute, at best disturbing, or outright offensive and since it involves minors, criminal.

Why would a minor dance in a sexually provocative way? Is it to attract a mate? Minors aren’t legally permitted to mate, nor marry nor give birth. Why then would a minor be directed in a movie to perform sexual seductive acts? Is it to attract men?  Its crime for a man to be sexual involved with a minor. People who denounce this movie for preparing the ground for criminal acts are on track.

Perhaps, Netflix, together with those who produced the movie are aware of the hypocrisy that led to the success of playboy magazine back in the 50’s. When Hugh Hefner launched playboy in 1953, there was certainly a loud public outcry, and people lashed out against playboy and many families avoided going to a cinema advertising pornography, yet astonishingly, even as protests were on going, private purchase of pornographic VCR tapes was skyrocketing, and thus Hefner who was making big bucks couldn’t care less about public protest. He saw the protest for what it was worth, worthless hypocrisy.

Perhaps, Netflix, like Hefner, is determined to ride out the storm, stay the course and in the end make a lot of money. By being innovators of child pornography, they are rest assured that there will be plenty of bucks at the end of the tunnel. It may even be that Cuties is even at this moment experiencing a windfall in spite of the pretense at protest. Thus, those of us who wish to resist the Cuties “new normal” must guard against curiosity, and hypocrisy and stop privately funding Cuties by watching it in private or else we would be hypocritically cooperating in the triumph of sexual objectification of minors and would be no different from pedophiles for whom Netflix made this movie .

Furthermore, this is not an isolated incident. There are far worse content that we should all stand up against. The Internet is brimming with pornography websites, chief of which is Porn hub, a publicly listed company in USA, with more than 40 billion visitors yearly, where anyone can upload pornographic content no matter how deviant.  Research confirms that many of the content in these sites involve minors, kidnapped or trafficked women and children. Society cannot afford to turn a blind to these extremely hard core sites while fretting over Cuties because again, that would be hypocrisy. It is sad that studies has it that pornography addiction is very high among Christians who attend Church regularly, people who should be at the vanguard of the fight against pornography. Little wonder then that pornographer are getting richer by the hour. We all need to join hand together to fight this or else Netflix’s persistence will eventually lead to the normalization of film like Cuties.





Marvel superhero, Evangeline Lilly says nudes she did 20 years ago still haunt her

2 01 2020
Evangeline Lilly

Any self-respecting person would be indignant if asked to peep through a keyhole to watch people having sex. Yet no one grips at the millions peeping at sex scenes in blockbusters movies. Men, women, and children, young and old around the globe sit with glazed eyeballs glued on nudities and even perverse sex on their screens and no one bats an eyelid, as Shylock movie directors rake in billions at box offices. But there are hidden costs and sometimes actors and actress pay dearly for it.  Marvel superhero, Evangeline Lilly freshly revealed that nudes she did 20 years ago still haunt her.

Lilly did partial nudes on a hit TV show called “Lost” that ran from the mid-to-late 2000s. She said that at 20, she was pressured by cutthroat directors who told her in no uncertain terms to bare it or lose it. She added that she will never do nudes again now that she has control over her career. She said hated those scripts casting her as a sex object.

“I did throw scripts across the room when I’d read them,” she scoffed.

And she is not alone. Famous actress, Mila Kunis, was once told she would have to pose half-naked on the cover of a men’s magazine to promote a film. When she refused, a producer reportedly threatened her by saying, “You’ll never work in this town again.”

With executioner’s axe hanging over their contracts, young actors and actress debase themselves on camera; years afterward, it returns to haunt and humiliate them, their families, and their friends.

Even though no one talks about it and no advocacy groups fight their causes, it is without a doubt that no one should be subjected to this shamefulness.  Normal people cherish their privacy. Few sane men invite their bridge club to watch them making love to their wives or post videos of their bedroom antics online for every eye to see, so it shouldn’t be surprising that many actors and actresses deeply detest these roles.

 “I can’t ever imagine myself doing nudity in a film,” superstar Magan Fox told MTV News in 2009. “It lives forever, especially now, with the Internet. I just can’t. I just can’t…Literally, all I have left are my private parts and I don’t want to also share them with the world. I’d like to keep them private. That’s why they’re called that!” Read more

 It is funny that in backwater Africa, only criminals are paraded naked on the streets, it appears that in the more “civilized societies”, stars are paraded naked.  Though they drape a cloak of glamour over it, when the wind blows, it exposes the wrecked lives underneath.

Due to the emotional distress and shame involved in shooting these sex scenes: the presence of an entire crew of camera people, set people, makeup artists, and directors barking orders at you–while you’re butt naked and cavorting—many established actresses opt-out and many more insist on “no nudity clause” in their contract.

Pundits scoff at the adverse effect of nudes. They claim it is just like any other job and that most sex scenes utilize body-double, computer-generated images (CGI), and nude-colored underwear to provide the illusion of sex, and that there is nothing wrong with it. But blockbusters don’t come with a rider that sex scenes are CGIs, nor do they deny that in many movies sex scenes involve real sex before the camera crew and that a body double is still someone’s body.

Actors and actresses are professionals but they aren’t immune to the effects of nudes, they are humans, with emotions and passions. It also disrupts social, and family ties. Superstar, Julia Robert, a mother of three, feels it is inappropriate for her to do nudes as a parent.

Nudes and sex scenes could account for the unusually high marital infidelity in Hollywood with an average divorce rate of celebrities at 52%, which is 2 times higher than the general population. Female has a 62% divorce rate, while the divorce rate of male is 50%  

When all is said and done, no one can deny the evidence that nudes add to the objectification and exploitation of women by the industry, the recent case of Harvey Weinstein whose historic abuse of actresses working for him is still emerging. But the millions of people who watch these movies without discernment contribute indirectly in this objectification.

Furthermore, studies show that watching nudes harms young adults as well. Teen and young adults who watch pornography do less well than their peers in school.

According to brietbiet.com, the Hollywood directors who forced Lily to undress have apologized, but this hardly goes far enough. Hollywood should take responsibility for what has been going on for who knows how long now.

They should thank Lily for bringing it to light, take a cue from it and learn their scripts: featuring nude scenes can and does violate people’s dignity! They should stop making box office earnings and profit their only consideration and encourage people to opt out of nudes without retributions.

Government and regulatory institutions shouldn’t be silent either. They should see to it that movie directors and movie houses do the right thing and initiate changes and those who don’t should pay punitive fines and have their licenses revoked–a good deterrent for those who wish to act like pimps and sex traffickers– brutally degrading the dignity of their employees for profit.

Perhaps next time you are tempted to watch a nude scene, you should look behind the scene to see the tears and anguish of men and women scared for life be their forced debasement for your enjoyment.

By Chinwuba Iyizoba





Peer pressure: The Caving of Miley Cyrus

12 08 2019

By Chinwuba Iyizoba

The corruption of the best is said to be the worst. This is evident in the case of Miley Cyrus, a once adorable chastely dressed girl who attended church on a regular basis and wore a purity ring as a child.
She became a teen idol with millions of fans when she was 11 because of her role in the Disney Channel television series Hannah Montana.
She went from success to success, winning Golden Globes and being named the fourth best-selling female artist in 2009. Millions of copies of her Hannah Montana soundtrack were sold. She had her first taste of success when she performed for Queen Elizabeth II and other members of the British Royal Family at the Royal Variety Performance in Blackpool, Lancashire.
Unfortunately, things went south in 2010. Her film “The Last Song,” based on Nicholas Sparks’ novel, performed poorly, and her studio album that same year was a commercial flop.
She fired her old manager and hired a new one who advised her to take a wrecking ball to her decent girl image, blaming her string of failures on her unsexy image.
She took the advice and evolved from a wholesome woman to the highly sexualized woman we see today.
She told her transformation story in a video interview in 2014.
“It was always there.” Miley is boring, boring, boring, she said, revealing the unrelenting peer pressure that modern celebrities face.
She didn’t need much convincing; she enjoyed being a celebrity, and if going bare will keep her there, so be it!

Against her mother’s advice, she abandoned her proper attire in favor of naked profanity. Her 2013 album “Wrecking Ball” featured a naked girl swinging on a wrecking ball. It received over nineteen million views on its first day of release and became the first single to top the US Hot 100 chart, selling over two million copies.
Fame and power–honey she had once tasted and loved–returned in torrents to her tongue. She is now estimated to be worth around $200 million.
In the same video, her mother stated that while she does not agree with everything Miley does, “we must understand that we are dealing with a 21 yro girl, and this is what 21 yr olds do, Miley is just doing hers in front of the world.”
However, private matters should be kept private.
True, parents should give their adult children the freedom to live their lives, but they should never abandon their responsibility to correct them when they make mistakes, especially if they result from peer pressure.

Public nakedness is inappropriate because it can elicit either extreme revulsion or extreme attraction; the same parts of the body that attract sexually are also repulsive during excretion. That is why decent people prefer to be naked only in private and in front of people they trust. Exposed private parts can arouse lust or derision in strangers. Lust is the more dangerous of the two.
Lust is a craving force that can lead to criminal acts such as rape and murder. When abused, sex has a devastating effect on society. “Someone who abuses sex may easily populate a whole village,” writes C.S Lewis.

It is therefore common sense to control and moderate this power through appropriate attire. Dressing modestly means living charitably with others because it is charity to avoid arousing lust or revulsion in others. Unfortunately, the modern entertainment industry is only concerned with making money.
If they want money, power, and fame, today’s showbiz stars must dance naked in front of a camera crew. It is an echo of the ancient serpentine offer, “I will give thee all the kingdoms of the world.” If you kneel and worship me.” Although Jesus declined the offer, many celebrities are eagerly accepting it.

Yet, as the Bible says, “the canal cannot see God.” Miley regularly wears devil horns on stage and continues to devolve into vicious license, and things are quickly going dark for her.
She is incapable of a faithful lifelong love because she is a sex slave and selfish. After only 8 months of marriage, she left her husband, Liam Hemsworth, for a lesbian.
She is now a fervent supporter of every sexual outcast. She is bent on sexualizing her teen followers, and she is a strong supporter of abortion and infanticide. She recently posted a picture on Instagram of her serpent tongue on an abortion cake.
Her addicted fans adore her and, like puppets, imitate her excesses to their own detriment.
Miley Cyrus performs a pornographic dance atop the chaste grave. On the other hand, Hanna Montana and her unscrupulous collaborators should be aware that what they are doing has a huge and devastating cost.
According to researcher Patrick Fagan Ph.D., internet pornography is killing families and is the cause of half of the divorces, with over 40 million addicts in the United States alone.
Porn addiction is linked to rape and other sex crimes, just as drug addiction has a strong tendency to violence to satisfy cravings. According to FBI statistics, pornography can be found at 80 percent of violent sex crime scenes or in the homes of the perpetrators.”
A large proportion of Miley’s 44 million Facebook followers are teen boys who struggle in school due to problems with problem-solving, reasoning, and comprehension abilities, all of which are required for academic success.
These are real costs that ordinary people, parents, mothers and fathers, husbands and wives, must bear. They would be wise to monitor the type of social media content their children consume in order to protect their homes and children from these disruptive influences.
However, it is important to remember that Jesus did not come to save the righteous but sinners. The corrupted can be purified to shine brighter than diamonds through more energetic supernatural means of prayer and fasting. Let us not abandon this soul to her wantonness due to a lack of prayer and fasting.

Chinwuba Iyizoba is the Editor of Authors-choice.





33 Ways to Keep Your Virginity till Marriage by Niphmy Isiwa

16 09 2018

In a world filled with sexual imagery, and boyfriends demanding sex, so many girls are wondering how they can possibly keep their virginity till marriage. Here are some rules that help you keep your virginity and still enjoy a loving relationship with your boyfriend:

1. Turn the lights on. Getting caught up in the moment is way easier to do in the dark. Darkness hides things, but if you keep everything in the light, you’ll be able to see more clearly both in your head and in your heart.

2. Get out. It’s easy to let your hangout default become something that involves snuggling while glaring at a screen. Too much of that and you’ll get super comfortable and then super bored. Bored and comfortable can lead to trouble. Get out and get active. Volunteer for a worthy cause, be adventurous in the great outdoors, pick up a new hobby, play a sport, learn a new skill, whatever it is, your time discovering new things together will help you discover new things about each other. And while you’re at it, invite another couple, or your entire posse, to join you.

3. Put yourself in interruptible situations. While this isn’t always possible, do your best to allow yourself to be interrupted. Something as simple as cracking the door to your dorm room ensures that you won’t let things go.

4. Be accountable. If you’ve struggled with sexual purity in the past, find yourself an accountability partner who will ask you how things are going. It will motivate you to know that you can give a good report when prompted.

5. Spare the details. Having the “how far have you gone” conversation is mainly about idle curiosity and can stir up unnecessary images and desires. You don’t owe your boyfriend/girlfriend a detailed account of your sexual history. There may come a time when general information that will affect your relationship needs to be shared, but again, spare the details.

6. Give yourself a curfew. The later it gets the longer you have to let things go too far. Set a definitive time to say goodnight and go your separate ways. Grandma is right: “Nothing good ever happens after 2 AM.” Or is it midnight? I guess it depends on who your grandma is. Either way, figure out what is reasonable for you and stick to it.

7. Be committed. Know who you are and whose you are. Know why keeping your virginity till marriage matters. Then make a commitment–to God, to yourself, and to each other–that you will strive for keeping your virginity till marriage. If you’re halfhearted, your resolve won’t last long. And if you’re not on the same page, it’ll be very, very difficult. But if you’re both serious about being holy and keeping your relationship pure, you have a real shot.

8. Pray for each other. The purpose of dating is to discern marriage; the purpose of marriage is to get each other to heaven. If you’re not praying avidly for your partner’s sanctification, what are you doing? Pray to keep your virginity, of course, but pray for your partner even more. It’s easier, I think, to be willing to compromise your own salvation in the heat of the moment than to endanger the soul of someone you love and for whom you pray daily. Making little sacrifices and offering them for your partner’s virginity will keep this at the forefront of your mind–and probably bring that desire to mind when other desires threaten to push it aside.

9. Set boundaries. “We’re not going to have sex” is a great start, but there’s more to keeping your virginity till marriage than just avoiding intercourse before marriage. Sit down early in the relationship and discuss what you think is appropriate in different stages in your relationship. It strikes me as fairly obvious that touching things you don’t have (pause to make sure everyone’s grasping my euphemism) is reserved for marriage. But maybe you’re like me and you think “Don’t do anything you wouldn’t do with your grandma looking on” is a good rule of thumb. Or maybe you don’t want to kiss before you’re engaged. Maybe you want to talk about how many feet should be on the floor when you’re cuddling. Try not to be too legalistic, but do be aware that there’s more to keeping your virginity till marriage than sex. If you’re not comfortable having this conversation with your partner, you might want to reconsider either this relationship or your readiness to be in a relationship. It might be awkward but it’s important enough to endure

10. Dress chastely. Your bodies are lovely and there’s nothing dirty or wrong about them. But they were made to be given only to the body–and the eyes–of your husband. Even if you’re not willing to dress chastely for the myriad men in your life who are trying desperately to see you as a person and not an object, do it for the one man you love. If you’re dressed like you’re wearing clothes, not underwear, then he’ll have less trouble

11. Don’t watch pornography! The solution to temptation is not to indulge that temptation in another venue. Using pornography and masturbating don’t release sexual tension, they distort it and cause it to grow. Pornography is also as addictive as crack and has serious consequences on more than just your love life. Here are some tips on leaving pornography behind. Do it now.

12. Repent. You’re going to fall. Don’t give up! Get up, get to confession, and redouble your effort. Reconsider your relationship and the rules you’ve set for yourself. Talk to a trusted friend. Cry and pout and punch a wall but do NOT give up. It’s a hard road, but remember that you follow a God who fell three times under the cross. He knew you would fall. He forgives you. He wants you to try again.

13. In the same spirit, avoid activities —whether together, alone, or with other friends—that will fill your mind with carnal themes and heighten your sexual arousal. Resist the devil (James 4:6-8) as he tempts you to sext, talk dirty or posture your body in suggestive ways, surf or rent even “soft” porn, wear revealing clothing, participate fully in a rowdy, worldly party like a bachelor or bachelorette party (eg. where strippers or unrestrained drugs or alcohol will be present).

14. Don’t be fixated on physical intimacy. Learning hobbies, skills, new challenges, gifts, talents, ministry and personal goals, conflict resolution, and communication skills are all necessary facets for developing a solid and interesting friendship on the spiritual foundation of Christ.

15. Go to church regularly. Participate in ministry together. Serving together in a shared ministry will increase your awareness of the world around you and dilute your focus on each other.

16. Do more group activities than alone-together activities, especially if physical intimacy is becoming a distraction. Hang out in public places, hang out with family and friends, and don’t spend too much time in the dark or alone in your vehicles or residences.

17. You may have to let go. A “relationship fast” helps reset your relationship on an operating system of purity if you have become physically involved. This would involve breaking off all communications for an agreed amount of time to seek the Lord and His direction and strength as well as consult others to restart the relationship on a clean note.

18. Encourage him to be the kind of man that you want him to be. Positive reinforcement goes a long way, but don’t do it in a condescending way like he’s a well-meaning child. “I love going to adoration with you,’ with an affectionate hand squeeze (or, if appropriate, cheek kiss) is more likely to produce the desired results than a two-hour heated debate. Good men love to do things for the women that they care about, and knowing how much you appreciate these gestures will make him want to do them even more.

19. Invite one another to pray. The easiest way to pray more is… to pray more. It’s great when he takes the lead on this, but it’s just fine for you to do so, too. If he’s smart, he’ll get the clue. Pray at the start and end of dates. If you’re on the phone in the evenings, pray together before you go to bed. Frame your relationship in prayer until it’s the most natural thing to do in the world.

20. Develop non-physical ways of showing affection, love (if appropriate), and contrition. Guard against the temptation to say “I’m sorry” or “I love you” physically.

21. Location! Avoid anything that’s a near occasion of sin. Avoid any situation that could quickly take a turn. One of the best ways to do this is to remain within eyesight and earshot of others at all times.

22. Don’t be afraid to leave a situation, if that’s what virtue demands. Sometimes, girls (especially, but also guys) won’t want to end the night early because they’re afraid of being rude… even when they recognize that sticking around longer will only lead to trouble.

23. The purpose of dating is to find the person you wish to marry, the one who will become the father or mother of your children. Keep that always in mind and terminate the relationship if and as soon as you realize this is not the person.

24. Never allow yourself to be alone in a closed room or parked car with your date.

25. Always plan to be active on a date. Have activities lined up (backup plans too) so you don’t find yourself in a position or situation of idleness. The offense is a good defense. Think of activities that will provide opportunities for growth in knowledge of God, each other, and self. Make a regular practice of worshipping and praying together.

26. Dress appropriately for the occasion but always modestly.

27. Regardless of who “pays” for the date no one “owes” anybody anything.

28. Any actions that cause sexual arousal (need I define them?) are to be avoided, including forms of dancing that are designed to cause it. Help each other to say no.

29. A peck, a quick kiss (mouths closed) a brief hug, or holding hands are permissible, they are non-sexual expressions of affection.

30. Don’t kid yourself. You are no different from anyone else. Don’t count on your self-control. You are weak! You just can’t go “so far.”

31. Your soul is at stake and perhaps a happy marriage and a possible vocation.

32. The road to keeping one’s virginity till marriage is paved with prayer, the Eucharist, and reading of the New Testament. If you fail, have recourse to the Sacrament of Penance as soon as possible and begin again.

33. Follow these rules and make sure your date or companion does also and the search for a spouse and courtship can be a joy. Otherwise, you may become accomplices in deadly sin and guilty of objectifying another person for sexual pleasure. Keep these rules and you will be able to look at your children right in the eyes when you have to guide them on their





Marvel Superhero Actress Pained by Past Nude Scenes

7 08 2018

Marvel superhero actress, Evangeline Lilly revealed that she is still distressed over doing partially nude scenes on a hit TV show called “Lost” that ran from the mid-to-late 2000s

Lily’s admission is coming on the heel of the explosive sex scandals rocking Hollywood. This is yet another proof that harassment is a multifaceted vice that isn’t just limited to acts of soliciting for sex from vulnerable actresses, by rich and powerful movie producers, on whose hands, their fate and careers rest. Pressing an actress to undress on screen is in itself a pernicious form of sexual harassment.

According to Lilly, she felt pressured to doing those nude scenes as a young 20-something actress. She went on to exclaim that she will never do nude scenes again now that she has more control over her career.
She hated those scripts which was casting her character, Kate, as a sex object. Kate went from being a strong woman with her own story to just chasing men around the island.

“I did throw scripts across room when Id read them,” she added. “Theres nothing wrong with womens lives being characterized by their relationships. But there was this eventual lack of dimension to what was going on with her.”

The ever growing number of Hollywood movies laced with nudity and licentiousness do in fact harm the women and men who are forced to act these scenes.

Often young and insecure, they easily succumb to subtle or not so subtle threats of contract terminations and censures hovering like the executioner’s axe over their necks. Not many have the mettle to say no, fewer still, have the courage speak up like Lilly did, even after many years have passed.

Again, it’s not uncommon for people who do nude scenes to be scorned by family and friends who may feel embarrassed and humiliated, leaving a string of strained relationship with spouse and children. In poor countries like Africa, criminals are often paraded nude on the streets to the shame of their families. Rich countries like Europe and America should hold themselves to a higher standard— even if it’s only a movie. Sadly, this is far from being the case; there is rather a mindless nudity everywhere. Online click-baiting nudes pervade the Internet. Drool baiting nakedness on primetime television, glossy magazines and billboards are wide currency. Thanks to Lillys story, we know a little more about the hidden costs of these lascivious indulgences: wrecked lives and regrets.

Why should we be surprised that Lilly is hurt when forced to go naked for the public. Even for a large sum of money, how many people would throw their bathroom doors open to crowds of onlookers while taking their showers. Yet sex scenes are regular staple in movies.

Nude scenes do harm to the viewers as well, especially the young. Studies show that teen and young adults who spend more time watching movies (80% of Hollywood movies have nude scenes) do less well than their peers in school.

According to brietbiet.com, the director who forced Lily to undress has apologized, but this hardly goes far enough. Hollywood should take responsibility for what has been going on for far too long.

They should thank Lilly for bringing it to light, take a cue and learn the scripts: nude scenes can and do violate people’s dignity! They should stop making box office earnings their only consideration and encourage people to opt out of nudes without retributions.

Government and regulatory institutions shouldn’t be silent either. They should see to it that that these people do the right thing and initiate changes or pay punitive fines and have their licenses revoked–a good deterrent for those wish to act like pimps and sex traffickers

Perhaps next time you come across a nude scene on your screen, you would look behind the scene to see the tears and anguish.

By Chinwuba Iyizoba

 

 





The canal man

4 11 2017

Sometime ago, someone sent me a picture of a “church”building designed like a naked woman, legs spread and the entrance to this church through her sex organ. I was shocked at the crudity of those who put these things up on social media and horrified by the picture.

(sorry it would be highly inappropriate to publish the picture here)

I don’t know if the picture is real or not, I don’t know if such a building exists or not, but one thing I know for sure is that the devil has the world on a checkmate, yes with canality! The canal man  can not see God, God says, and the devil knows. The modern man’s obsession with genitalia and the unbearable abuse of every available media, print, movies, Internet, billboards with bizarre public showcasing of naked men and women in grotesque sex, acts previously unspeakable even in private whispers. The devil’s campaign of canality is the utter annihilation of every vestige of divine and holy in the souls of men, is gaining him a massive harvest of damned souls into eternal burning sulfur of hell of the damned. Before this time, a man who wished to damn his soul must seek out damnation in dark lurid holes, perhaps even spending money to find his ruinous pleasures in dark and seedy tarvans. No more. Tides have turned. Hell is loosed, and demonic things are common place. Christ is hemmed in from all sides, prevented from reaching the souls of men women and children, for whom he died. The man or woman who wishes to be saved must guard his/her sight and flee . Like Odyssey , he must plug his ears or the sirens of hades will snap tiny strings binding him to the Way of salvation.
He must carry his own environment with him, maintaining an interior dailog inside his heart with God. He must learn to ignore the world, and switch of television shows with immoral content. Like a soldier in a minefield, he must tread with caution on the Internet, sidestepping clips and views poisonous to his soul. No one is immuned, neither young nor old, for what stains a child, stains an adult. Scripture says, if you so much as look at a woman with lust, you have committed Adultery. Do we wonder why Adultery is epidemic sweeping our neighborhoods? Let us be wise and guard our hearts, guard our eyes.

In this video Bishop Barron describes how the fruits of the spirit are kindness, peace, generosity and happiness, while the fruits of the devil are canality, wickedness and immorality.





  The media should be consistent :Weinstein sex scandal

22 10 2017

The media’s excoriation of Harvey Weinstein, a movie producer, for his taking advantage of women is at best self-contradictory.
Everyone knows the tons of pornographic filth churned out each year; so-called blockbusters, glorified by the media that has gone on to win Oscars.
These movies exult marital infidelities, scandals, defamations, divorce, lying, and cheating… at times, perverse ‘lifestyles’ are ‘aired out’ to attract public curiosity though without any attempt to treat the subject on a moral plane. These films have done grave damage to society’s morals. Consequently today many have lost or are losing their sense of sin and sense of God.
The dismal list of sexual abuse by respected public figures like Roger Ailes, Bill Cosby, Dominique Strauss-Kahn, and Bill Clinton, is only the first rumble of a volcano in full eruption.

What about college campuses? What goes on in there is unspeakable! The chronic sexual assaults happening on daily basis testify that when unnatural behaviors contrary to divine laws are treated as the norm in films, on television, and in the press, common sense, decency and nobility vanishes in society

As Peter Maurin said, “A good society is one that makes it easy for its citizens to be good. And a bad society is one that makes it easy to be bad.”

The media and Hollywood have made it incredibly tough for citizens to be good. There are over 2000 registered companies in the US alone that produces adult movies and millions of porn websites available on smartphones at the touch of the screen

All I am saying is that the media should be consistent!
It’s unreasonable and unjust to glamorize adultery and fornication on screen and turn around and scowl when men live out these dreams.
Why pretend to be shocked? People are what they watch or in the case of Weinstein, what they do?
Perhaps, the London motion picture Academy did right by stripping Weinstein of his fellowship but, it should also strip itself because it shares a part in the problem.

By Chinwuba Iyizoba

The Editor





The War on Children: CSE exposed,  explioting children! 

6 04 2017

​This video is worth 20 min of your time. 

Comprehensive sex education (CSE) is an aggressive attack on children’s  minds. We should join hands and STOP it. 

http://www.comprehensivesexualityeducation.org/act-now-2/stop-cse-petition/#

 





Why Ms Johnson Wants Her Mom to Watch her Naked on TV

13 09 2016

In the past if you were a hooker or porn star, you hid it from family.  You wouldn’t want Mom and Dad to know about it. Today’s people are no longer ashamed of anything and they portray their shamelessness using rude words. Please watch Ms Dakota Johnson rudely berating her  Mom, Melania Griffith for not having watched her bare ass on TV in “Fifty Shades of Gray.” How much lower can she go ?





My Husband is A Porn Addict: A Recovery Guide for Wives

2 04 2016

 

878060-017

My Husband is a Porn Addict by Cindy beall

My Husband’s a Porn addict: How Can I compete With Her?

I’ll never forget the first time I walked in on my husband looking at Internet
pornography. Immediately my heart sank, and I remember this sick feeling wash
over me. The thought that began to plague my mind instantly was, “How will I ever
be able to compete with her?”
If I think about that day I can remember exactly what the woman looked like. How
she was posing and what her facial expression was. I would tell you what she was
wearing but that’s just it…she wasn’t wearing anything. She was very well endowed
and made me look like I was just about to get my first training bra. Her long,
gorgeous, blonde hair cascaded over her shoulders but not enough to cover up
anything.
I knew my husband, Chris, struggled with lust because we’d been married for five
years. His admissions seemed to be vulnerable and honest but I’d later find it was
just a smokescreen. I didn’t realize how hard it would hit me to walk in on him in the
middle of him fulfilling his lustful moment. I guess I was okay with his sin being “out
of sight, out of mind.”
Chris’ introduction to pornography came when he was merely eight years old. He
didn’t ask for his sin to begin at that age, but it did. And for a growing, curious
boy the desire to see more only grew throughout the rest of his childhood and
adolescence. The hunger could be satiated by an occasional look at a National
Geographic if you weren’t picky about the kind of naked women you’d see. His
newfound addiction didn’t totally bombard his life as a youngster simply because
to obtain such racy material meant that you had to know someone who could buy a
Playboyor a Penthousefrom the local convenience store.

The date is indelibly written in my mind. I will never forget what I was doing when
Chris walked in the door that Tuesday morning. We’d been in our new home in our
new town for less than a week when he dropped the biggest bomb on me. After
asking me to join him on the sofa, he proceeded to tell me that he’d been unfaithful
to me many times with many different women over a period of about two-and-a-half
years. In the midst of my immediate reeling, devastation, and line of questioning, he
admitted that he was a full-blown porn addict.
In the early days, looking at pictures of naked women was enough to satisfy his
craving. But, over time, looking at pictures turned into watching videos, which
eventually turned into chatting with women who were just as messed up as he was.
And before long, the unthinkable occurred: His online fantasy became a reality with
a woman.
As he shared with me how this once small addiction spiraled out of control, I
learned that these horrendous actions weren’t because he didn’t love me but
because he was unable—or unwilling—to get free from his addiction. It sure didn’t
feel like he loved me but eventually I realized that the bondage that took over his life
was more than he could handle. So he acted out. .continue reading








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